Husband Nervous About Gender

  • My husband and I were married a very short time before we got pregnant, and he has been INCREDIBLE!! I am continuously amazed at how blessed I was with this man. However, he's having a bit of trouble with the sex of our child. We are due in less than a week and we don't know what the sex of our baby is. We've both wanted a boy from the beginning, but it goes deeper than that for him. He really really REALLY doesn't want a girl, and I don't know what to do about it. It's very hurtful to think that if it's a girl, he won't be able to love her or even accept her. He'll lose out on so much if he can't, and our little girl will have quite a few problems of her own. I don't know how to deal with this issue!

  • Congratulations on your pregnancy! My fiancee wanted a boy so bad he could not fathom the idea I am carrying a girl. When we found out it was a girl you could see the disappointment on his face and the heartache in his heart. But know that we are almost due he couldn't be more excited.

    Most men want a boy and the reality is 50% get one. But once the baby gets here, no matter the gender he will love the child. Babies seem to steal their daddys' heart in just a matter of seconds where mommies have had their heart stolen from the time they read pregnant on the stick, so I wouldn't stress about it. Just try to reassure him that gender doesn't matter and he still seems disappointed remind him gently girls can do anything that boys can do (the reason my fiancee wanted a boy is to throw the football with and carry on his last name). I found little things like calling her daddys little princess and angel help too. Hope this helps

  • Try talking to your husband about why he is so upset about possibly having a girl. Is he worried about caring for her? Unsure of how he'll relate to her? Or is it something else? If you can get him to open up, you might be able to discuss his fears and uncertainties. I doubt that if you have a little girl, that your husband won't love her just as much as he would a son. Most men don't think they will know what to do with a daughter until they have one. Just be patient and try not to panic. I think he'll be surprised at how much he instantly loves his baby--no matter what the gender!

  • Happynewmommy12-I so have to agree with skatieyonts.  What I have observed is that from the very moment daddy lays his eyes on his daughter he is never the same.  These guys fall in love with their daughters, and you never hear another word about "what happened to the baby boy" issue.

    I'd wait until after your daughter meets her daddy to worry much about things.  There is nothing like a dad's love for his daughter.  Let us know how things are going for you. :)

    -Jess

  • Congrats on your baby coming so soon! I agree with skatieyonts - odds are your husband has a lot of dreams for a boy in his life and plans for the future. It's really rare, though, that a little girl doesn't capture her father's heart after she is born. If you do have a girl, just look for ways to bond them. Point out features that look like him, the way she looks at him or responds to him, and give him time to adjust. I bet things will turn out just fine. Let us know how your birth goes!!

  • BABY HAS ARRIVED!!!Big SmileBig SmileBig SmileBig SmileBig Smile A beautiful, healthy, sweet baby girl!! You were all right! He fell in love immediately!! Thank you all!!!

  • Wonderful! :-) So glad things worked out for you. Sounds like you are a happy and healthy family - blessings!

  • Congratulations! I am very excited for you and your family.

  • HappyNewMommy-

    Oh i got chills reading your post! I am so happy that you have a healthy girl and that she has already swept dad off his feet.  Great, great news!  Do keep us posted on how things are going.  Get some sleep when you can. Thank you for sharing with us, you made my day. Big SmileSmileBig Smile

    -Jess