State of Confusion

  • I am 20 years old and a little past 6 months pregnant. Me and my child have been on & off for 4 years and we both attend college. Recently, we have just broken up for good because of his constant lying and the relationship was not healthy. I am realizing that I will probably be raising our baby mostly on my own. My issue is that I live 3 hours from my family while in school and I have no real friends where I am at. I get lonely and often don't know what to do with myself. This is when I think about him and wonder if we can still make it work even though I know its not the best idea. Does anybody have any advice on how to keep myself from feeling alone and depressed?

  • First of all, congratulations on your pregnancy. If honesty is the major problem with the baby's father, then you made the right call. Getting together with him again may ease your lonliness temporarily, but seemingly would bring much greater heartache later. Most communities have support groups for single parents and I would ask your doctor about finding such communities. Being a parent is difficult and doing it alone while in college will be even harder, but believe in yourself and you can get it done. Good luck!

  • Yes! Talk to your doctor and see if he/she knows of a support group for single mothers. Sometimes they are playgroups that you can join such as MOPS and other types of groups that would let you meet other women in your same position. Sometimes finding a few friends who understand what you are going through makes all the difference. If you find that you are getting depressed, your doctor could recommend a guidance counselor to help. Good luck and I hope this helps!

     

  • I think that AnswerDad and MommyRN4 have great advice so far as finding a group of expecting or new moms in your community.  I think that these types of support groups are a great way to navigate through motherhood!

    Keep us posted,

    Jess

  • yeah, your doctor should be asking you if you're going to be a single parent, or even while you're in recovery after having the baby, a nurse may ask if you're living alone. that's what they did with me and was gonna offer services in assisting with the baby if i was. because no peron can raise a child alone. i have trouble even while living with the baby's father and living near family. there's just not enough hours in the day to do what you need to do AND take care of a new baby. you should really look into the support groups and especially WIC. and get a hold of family and friends back at home and see if they can throw you a baby shower. ;-)

  • Yes, me too I agree with their comments. Just enjoy your pregnancy divert your attention to the things that can make you happy. If getting together with him can cause headache its better to be separated. Make your baby as your inspiration in life for you to succeed in  whatever you want.

  • Thanks everyone for your great advice! I will be looking to join support groups soon and my mom is throwing me a shower next month! I am so excited for my little girl to come. I know it wont be easy but I am focused on being positive and making the best life I can for her :)

  • I went through the same thing and let me tell you, your baby feels what you feel so you made the right decision for now. Enjoy your pregnancy, read, and join support groups and stay in contact with your family and friends. Congratulations! Angel