A chance to voice my feelings...

  • I'm a new mom again it has been nine long years since I had a baby near me. I sort of  forgot all the work the sleepless nights, and the horomones. I'm not quite myself yet Im not sure how to reconnect with my husband and other adults. My mind mostly focuses on the baby.

  • It is only natural for you to be preoccupied with your new baby right now and it is hard to reconnect with other adults when you are with a baby all day. Give yourself some time to adjust and don't be too hard on yourself. It is important though to connect with your husband as much as you can...so make it a point to go to dinner one night or do something you both enjoy doing so you can reconnect and get closer. Good luck and congratulations.

  • ElizabethReneaMom-

    I so agree with MommyRN4, give yourself and family time to adjust to having not just a new member-but a new baby!  I think that we often don't recognize how much things change with a new baby, but also how good changes can be just as hard as difficult changes.  Given this have some empathy for yourself.  Allow yourself to feel your feelings and acknowledge that this too will pass.  I'd anticipate that sooner than later things will feel good again.  Just giving your body time to even out-from a hormone perspective-will help a lot!  Please come here for support if it is helpful.  We are more than happy to send hugs and encouragement your way!

    Take care,  Jess

  • Big Smile Thanks for your response, I hope there will be a time to go out with my husband and just relax a bit. He is a worker bee and if he is not at work, which he mostly is, then he is talking about work. I appreciate your ideas and happily accept them. We shall see. I'm a very proud mommy so thanks again for your kind words.

  • ElizabethReneaMom-

    It sounds like you have such a positive attitude.  That carries one far in life!  Keep us in the loop, happy to cheer and support you anytime! :)

    -jess

  • If your husband is preoccupied with work, you may need to plan a night to go out with him. Let him know how you feel and that you need some time to spend together. Then by giving him some notice, you may have a better chance of getting some quality date nights in! Good luck!

     

  • I found that when I just went out to dinner with my husband after the baby, we were both so baby focused it was hard to get the date going! Instead, we would go do an activity first like bowling or something silly like going to the arcades to relax and then grab some dessert after. It helps to get you back into the swing of having fun together! Another cheap favorite is taking our favorite board game to Starbucks and grabbing a coffee. :-) 

  • PediNurseJulie1....Seriously AWESOME suggestion. My fiance and I find it extremely difficult to let go of our daughter and go out by ourselves. I'm afraid that when we finally do we'll spend our night worrying about the baby and not have any fun. I'm sure this is common among parents.

  • Great suggestions... we also like to hang out with our favorite couple friends to feel like adults again! It's not easy with a newborn, but it's amazing what a few carefree hours can do to re-charge the batteries. Congrats and good luck!

  • Totally common, Brinny. I think lots of people deal with this! Hopefully you guys can find some fun activities to do together and enjoy each other! I try to remember that my son will benefit from parents with a loving and healthy relationship with each other. So really, by going out with my husband and keeping a relationship going strong with him, I'm creating a loving home for my son. It's a win win! :-) 

  • Never looked at it that was, but so true. We do tons of stuff together, just not without the baby. she's almost three months now so i'm starting to trust others with her a little more.