New at this. :)

  • Hello to all.  I'm new at this site.  I have a 4 month old girl and another baby due in December. I also have an 11 year old daughter, 6 year old son, and 5 year old son, but they are not living with me.  Any and all advice would be helpful.

  • Well welcome to the site and congrats on your little on and your upcoming little one.... May I ask what type of advice would you be looking for? Everyone here is really nice and we will try to help if we can.

  • Welcome to the website and congrats on your pregnancy!  It sounds like you have a lot of good helpers with you at home!  Let us know what it is we can help with, more than happy to help!

    -Jess :)

  • Thanks for the welcome.  Sadly my 3 oldest children are not living with me and its hard for them to accept my 4 month old because she is living with me.  I'm looking for advice on how to show them that I still love them just as much as her.  Its hard to see them hurt and feel like they are not loved.  On top of this, the upcoming babys father is in an emotional down hill slide thinking that he is not going to be a good dad which is making things hard for me to reensure him that he is a wonderful father to his other children and his love will be the same for this baby.    -Shadowpixie :)

  • Welcome! Sorry to hear about your older 3 children. Maybe you could include them all in the excitement of a new baby, as well as the one you have. Send them letters "from the baby" and send regular pictures that have little notes saying how much their sister loves them, etc. Perhaps ask for artwork from them to decorate the baby's room and demonstrate to them how important they are to you. Just a few ideas - I hope others have some too!

  • Thanks for the Ideas.  Sadly I am unable to see my older children for 2 more years.  In 2008 I got into the drug thing and went to prison. The courts put a no contact order on me for the well being of my children. Even thou I personaly can not be with them I am very lucky to have wonderful fathers that are more then willing to take Allearah to see her sister and brothers. Drug wise...I have been clean since Nov. 20th, 2008 and going strong. That stuff took me to a very low place and i realized that Its not just me that I hurt doing it. Thank the Lord my children are doing well and don't have major damage from the things I done. Their dads tell me that they are all growing well.  As for Allearah she is very connected to the siblings.  We painted a Family tree on her bedroom wall that is decorated with photos of them together. We made picture frames shaped of apples out of cardboard. All my children love it. Thank you for the advice.

     

  • Thanks for sharing your story! I'm absolutely thrilled for you that you have gotten clean and are doing well. It's not an easy journey to take! I admire your positive spirit and the little things you do to keep your daughter connected to her siblings. It'll pay off in the long run and I'll keep you in my thoughts. :-)

  • Awesome to hear you been clean for yourself & your kids. Thats the best thing you can do for them. I heard about maybe giving a gift of some kind from the 4 month old to your siblings. Everyone loves gifts.

  • I agree with can27dice.  One of the best things you can do is show integrity and work your recovery.  This will show your children your commitment to a healthy life for yourself and your children!

    -Jess