need a pick me

  • just in need of some positive thoughts! i am a 31yr single mother of 2 10yr old girl and 3 wk old boy!!! well I don't have a good relationship with my daughters father and the road looks real rocky with my sons father. I don't know what to do???? I know I need to work on my communication skills...But how??

  • hello mother of two.. i am a 23 yr old in my 29th wk... just thought id give you a little advice hopefully it helps. 

  • hello mother of two.. I am a 23 yr old in my 29th wk.. just thought id give you some advice hope it helps..

    well in my opinion the best thing for good communication is to be in a calm environment. hostility or harsh words almost never get you anywhere. I don't have any children of my own yet but i definitely have my share of experiences with friends family and people Ive observed.. Just always know that whether or not you will be with either of the children's fathers they should still be the "Father" or play the father role because every child deserves a father and a mother even if they aren't together. Not sure what problems you may have with them but you all need to know that its really not whats best for them or you, but the children, always the children. they are the most important aspect of the relationship you have with the fathers... If you and the both of them know what the main priorities are in raising your children communication should not be so hard.

    sincerely, mother to be Marian

  • Congrats on your new little one. What seems to be the communication problems you are facing? I'd love to hear more about what's going on so we can help you out. Most of all, I'm sure you are doing the best job you can and it's not easy being a single mom. Hugs to you!

  • Communication is a two way street...but sometimes we do things that obstruct that communication from being effective. Most of our communication skills (or lack thereof) are learned from our parents and from our past. There are ways to undo this bad behavior but it takes a lot of work and commitment. If your baby's father is up to it and you are as well, you should definitely go see a counselor. Counseling can help you determine what problems you are facing and help you learn how to communicate in a more loving way. I also recommend reading a few books, like "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff in Love" and "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus". Good luck and let us know how it goes.

  • Sometimes it is difficult to communicate with someone who doesn't want to or refuses to be civil with you. The best thing you can do is stay calm, stay focused on your children's needs, and do whats in the best interest for them no matter what. I know it is hard and frustrating but as long as you keep your dignity no one can take your power away.

  • morgan81-

    You posted this about a month ago so I wanted to check in with you and see how things are going for you and family.  Would love an update when you have time,