Selfish?

  • Hi everyone!

    I'm new here and I need some advice. I feel very selfish for even asking this. I swear I'm not a selfish person. I have a son who is almost two. He's my world. I spend a lot of time with him outside of work.

    I am expecting my second child in January. We did not plan this and I've been upset. I love babies and will love this baby. But, I have a hobby/passion that I fill some of my time up with. It's very important to me. I would love to do it as a career one day. I fear that with a second child I won't be able to keep doing it. Is that selfish? This is a big part of who I am and I don't want to regret anything down the road.

    If there are any moms of two out there you would be a big help. Is it realistic to think I can keep up with this hobby with two kids? My husband is very helpful. We do a great job of helping each other. If I need an hour to work out or run to the store..he takes my song and vise versa. But, I fear it won't be enough.

  • I am a mother of a two year old and a four month old.  Your not selfish you need your time to. Best thing for me was to change my routine so that I have at least an hour or two when both kids are a sleep at night to do my own thing. 

  • That is great advice. I do that now with my son. We put him to bed by 8 for two reasons. 1. He needs sleep and he wakes up at 6:30 to get ready for the day. 2. We need our time too and we want to and this allows us to do stuff and still go to bed at a reasonable time.

    Thank you so much!

  • I am having my second child but my husband has a passion/hobby that he does a lot more then i would like. But I didn't ask him to give it up I just asked him to cut down on his hobby/passion. He has. He spends time at work then at home and then his hobby/passion comes on the weekend. One day out of the week. You will find time around your schedule to still have your passion as long as you are still able to speed time with your family.