Help me!! I hurt and am at a loss!!

  • Great job, Cooke!! i was up feeding my little one this morning and was hoping that you were doing better.  Now, i know that you said you don't want to put anything on, but have you thought about a nipple shield?  i used one when i got my blister but it helped him to "learn" a little better or i could get my mind off of the pain and help him.  But they make some great ones and after a couple of times i felt better and didn't need it anymore.  i know that some people shy away from using "anything" as fear of the baby learning that-like a nipple-but my second son took to anything! :)  i'm so glad that you got to put him down! now, even though he is sucking his hands, he may not be hungry.  he might think of the sucking as more of a comfort so you could try to let him just hang out in his crib.  if you can just let him hang out.  you could try using a mobile to distract him.  i'm so glad to hear that you are doing better!!!  keep up the good work and the positivity.  it will help you tons to get to know that handsome little man! And again, GREAT JOB MOMMA!!!!

  • I agree - talk to your lactation consultant about using a nipple shield (You can pick them up in Target or Walmart for under $5). They worked really well for me and my oldest who refused to breast feed well, plus they give your nipples a break. Once he is eating well with the nipple shield you can work on weaning him off of it gradually. Does he take a pacifier? It could be that he just wants to suck and isn't very hungry. Make sure you are not trying to feed him more than every 2 1/2 - 3 hours. Sometimes babies get into bad habits of snacking and all they really want to do is suck on a pacifier. Try using various pacifiers til you find one that he likes. Then try to get him to go at least 2 1/2 hours in between feedings and he may eat better cause he will be more awake.


    The important thing is to not beat yourself up and do not feel like a failure. Nursing is hard....don't give up.

  • u both made a great point on his suckling, and thankful my Aunt Ruth sent us a package that had pacifiers in it that are perfect for him, even though he still spits them out, I don't mind, it gives me a chance to have him awake and not at the breast. just got the package Wednesday so been trying a lot of different approaches, I still have to look for shields, but the cream I bought does help.  and I thank you ladies so much for ur help, from one lil girl in West Virginia to you-THANK YOU

  • Took Jason to the Doctor yesterday so they could a weight check, he's up to 6lbs 15.4oz but not back at his birth weight of 7lbs 0.9oz, so they was to supplement him on neosure, and they gave me reglan to help with lactation, I'm hoping for the best.

  • It sounds like you have a great plan and a very supportive and appropriately proactive team of medical providers.  Great job on following up and your hard work as a mom,


  • Don't take it badly.  Take this as a time for you to heal and for him to get everything that he needs wiht the help of the supplementation.  You are doing great, momma!! Don't get frustrated or beat yourself up.  With the supplementation, he may be able to fill up so he isn't so hungry all the time.  My youngest was similar.  WE struggled with everything it seemed like a healthy baby could.  We couldn't get him back up to his birth weight either with me supplementing and nursing.  So, after three weeks and a million appointments at the clinic- he finally cleared once i stopped nursing and just fed him with a bottle.  (7oz in four days.  i felt so awful like i starved him or something.  i still feel guilty about it but he is three months old TODAY so it all worked out for us and it will for you too!!)  Good luck with everything and stay positive.  This may give you enough of a "break" to let you have some rest too.  you are doing great and he is lucky to have such a great mother.  i'm here if you need to talk.  God gave me huge ears, so i try to listen when i can. :)

  • hey cookie, how are you doing?  how is the little one?  i hope all is well with you guys!!!

  • You may consider calling your lactation nurse back again and telling her that your little guy is still tough to get a full feeding out of. Some babies will nurse at the breast and fall asleep because they struggle to transfer enough due to a number of factors. I'd ask for the lactation nurse to check his "frenulum". A lot of babies struggle with breast feeding if his little piece of skin under his tongue is tight. It makes you very sore and makes it a TON of work for him to transfer milk. He then sleeps when at the breast. It's worth a try!! 

    All this to say, you are NOT a failure for struggling to breast feed a baby. I work with MANY women and babies who are struggling with feeding. It's really usually not YOU at all! Your baby is still learning a huge skill and you are being SO PATIENT. Give yourself a pat on the back for all your hard work and take a deep breath. Keep us up to speed! 

  • we're doing ok, he still won't do a full feeding without falling asleep a lot, I haven't seen bed sence I got him home, our hours of feeding is so messed up, I dripping with milk when he is a sleep and when he awake I'm producing some because I pumped like 30mins b4 he wakes up to be feed threw the day, it's a mess.....

  • That was one of the 1st things I had checked on him weeks ago, his tongue will extend out beyond his lips, he just sleeps at the breast. I'm so confused

  • I'm not giving up, I'm not slept good for weeks, my days are long, I'm useally getting about 1or 2 of sleep at night in between trying to feed little man, my days start around 4 am, and ended around 10pm, restart for the 12am 2am and 4am feeding, all I have is time to spare so I can do what I feel I should be doing. I even scrubbed a floor yesterday-3 more floors to do, but it's only about 1 1/2hrs out of my day,

  • I'm sorry to hear that you are still struggling...and you sound exhausted. First of all, I want to tell you that you are doing a great job. Keep up the good work. 

    Did you look into a nipple shield yet? Make sure that you are waiting long enough in between feedings and make sure that he is good and hungry. Don't just feed him the first sign that he starts squirming or fussing. Make sure he has gone 3 hours.... and do not pump the whole 3 hours so you are sure you have enough milk. ...then sit down with your bottle of supplement and a nipple shield. Place the nipple shield on your breast and then see if you can get him to latch. If he is angry because he is hungry....see if you can express some of your milk into the shield so he realizes that it is there. After he nurses well on one side...burp him and then get up and change his diaper. Sometimes this will wake them up enough so that he is good and alert again and you can switch sides of your breast. 

    I encourage you to call a lactation consultant again and to stick with it. You are doing a great job and your baby is very lucky to have you. 

  • Any better?? Thinking of you!!!

  • I'm trying, up at 1:20 am usually last night he had me up at 10:20 I didn't even get to go to bed, then once I have him I get unrestful sleep for an hour or so up by 4am and start my day, I'm also potty training my 20month old, he is doing fantastic been on the pot all week, he gets a sticker for every time he goes, all I have to do is ask him and he runs to the potty..

    The nipple cream worked for a while, I'm not longer hurting and we get a great latch, but still struggling to keep him awake for a full feeding. but we're working it out.. My dad says he had a slow start because he didn't cry until 2 hours before he would've been a day old. but so far we're doing ok.. just still feel bad for not being able to do this successfully


  • Cooke, DO NOT FEEL BAD!!! the doctors, nurses and different program SCREAM breastfeeding, but they don't do a very good job at explaining that it is hard work.  look how dedicated you are to giving your son the best.  that says to all of us how great of a mother you are!! so, keep your head up and KNOW THAT YOU ARE A GREAT MOM and doing great!! don't be afraid to talk to people.  i also found when potty training my oldest son that telling him to try when it had been a while, helped him not to get to full (i don't know how accurate that is, but at least it made me feel like he wasn't waiting until the last minute to go.  we had a lot of accidents on the way to the bathroom until i started this)  we also celebrated ALOT and to this day, we still have to "see it in the potty" when he goes #2.  :)  the life of a parent is so much fun!  but hang in there lady!! try distracting him with a toy or even listenting to his older brother.  That way he will be more awake.  hang in there and know that you have good thoughts and prayers coming your way!!!