First Time Pregnancy and Somewhat feeling alone....

  • So this is my first time being pregnant. Came as a shocker actually. My boyfriend and I just started dating and lets just say this wasn't planned. But we are excited about it. More me than him. He has already had two kids. One who is coming in a couple of weeks for a summer visit. Im 13 weeks pregnant and scared out of my mind. I dont have any other pregnant friends my best friend is jealous so she avoids me ALOT. I feel i dont know.... alone. My boyfriend works at nights and sleeps during the day. I dont work so im home all the time. I have so many emotions and thoughts go through my head. I sleep all the time and feel like i dont get any sleep. I cry when i have nothing to cry about. I just really have no one to talk to. So my question really is...Does this get better and more enjoyable...Or will i be miserable and feeling alone the rest of my pregnancy??

  • Since this is a surprise baby, it is only natural that you are feeling a little overwhelmed and a bit alone right now. Your tiredness will improve with the pregnancy, but there is a lot going on in your body right now. Give yourself time to adjust. You are about to embark on a new chapter of your life, so it is wise to try and find friends who can support you and who understand what you are going through. Maybe there is a new mom's group in your community or a young moms group. That might help. If not, then try to focus your energy on finding friends at work or school who will support your decision to have a baby. Keep talking to your boyfriend and reach out to family members. Good luck--it does get better!

     

  • dont worry what you are feeling is completely normal. i was feeling the exact same way around that time and it has gotten better. this is my second and he came as a shock for me and my bf as well. but i cried alot and felt alone too i had no family support and i didnt want to talk to my friends about it. things start getting better for me around 20weeks when it was time to find out the gender of the baby that boost my excitement up alot. i hope you feel better soon :) its jus apart of being pregnant ugh

  • Thanks for the advice. I don't work or go to school. I want to go to school. But, hoping to start college. Hopefully little nervous about that. As far as the moms group goes for that matter. I live in an amish community alot of amish people who are very stuck to there ways. lol. But on the plus side I didn't have the morning sickness today and im glad about that. Because i ate and kept it down so YAY lol

  • Ya im in the same boat.My family lives about an hour from me and don't really have that much contact with me. And the only family that really contacts him is his mom and well lets just say me and him both don't um how do i put this nicely...Want her around that much? I know that sounds horrible but it happens i guess. My boyfriend and i are very excited about my next appointment because we find out the sex. He wants a girl and i don't really care what it is because its a baby that i get to love and care for and Its my baby. :-) Thanks for commenting. Helped me not feel so alone..

  • Hang in there with all the emotions and worry. Like the other posters said, pregnancy comes with all kinds of roller coaster emotions and since this little one wasn't planned it isn't surprising you are dealing with the shock of it all! As you get further along and feel the baby move and kick and see it on ultrasound, your bond will begin to grow. See if there are any mommy groups in the area you can join and come back here to get some support and love. Hugs!

  • Dont worry my boyfriend and I had just met each other when I got pregnant things were a little crazy in the beggining because we didnt know each other. I was very nervous to what the future would hold for us.He was always gone working so I was mostly alone I had crazy thoughts and a lot of what ifs. I cried a lot and spent a lot of time alone. I was scared it was my first baby. We got to know each other as time passed by. And now we cant be without each other. We had a beautiful healthy baby boy 9.5 lbs 22 inch. He defenetly brought us even closer. Dont stay alone even if you have to go to the movies alone do it. Get out and clear your mind,go shopping. Believe things will get better and try to stay positive :)

  • Thanks for the advice. My boyfriend and i are doing much much better. We communicate and he seems to watch how he reacts around me as if he is afraid to make me cry. He also likes to watch me sleep because i have weird dreams and i talk alot in my sleep. Its very comical in a way. Is that normal? Ive read that i will have weird dreams about things because im worried abt being pregnant but what about that talking?? hmm...O! We find out what we are having in two more weeks. Came up with a boys name and a girls name. So the excitement has kicked in. And i made a new friend. She works with my boyfriend. We all hang out her boyfriend also works with my boyfriend so we all go out like on double dates and stuff so its pretty exciting. It helps me take my mind off of things...So i would say im more positive now then i was at the beginning. It helps to have other moms to talk to. So this site is very helpful.

  • MomsRulez-

    It sounds like things are going better for you!  I am so glad to hear that you and your boyfriend are communicating better.  I am also really excited to hear that you are making some new friends.  It is really hard to feel isolated and lonely, so this is GREAT news!  I'm glad that the site has been helpful for you as well.  I think there are a lot of great people that come here and it feels very supportive to me as well.  I hope that you will keep us updated on how things are going.  Just reach out if you need anything-even just a listening ear.

    Take care, Jess

  • GOOD 4 U! im so happy to hear things are better...and about the dreams its totally normal I had some crazy ones my self dont be scared. Good luck! what do u want? Boy Or Girl? Boys are fun my Xavier is starting to reach for his toys its so exciting to him grow up he will be 3 months on the 15th. I will post pictures...hes a big boy :) Keep going out and keep busy. We are here to help each other. I wish I would have known about this site when I was pregnant it would have helped a lot.

  • Not really scared of the dreams well not all of them. I have this one where the closet in our bedroom talks to me. Not all that bad conversations. But still a lil scary. I dont know exactly what i want. I went along time threw life being told i wasnt allowed to have kids. So i dont know. The bf wants a girl really really bad. But i dont know exactly. I dont wanna say i want one thing and then get my hopes up and get another. Either way i will love my baby so i guess it just doesnt really matter. It sounds like your going to have a wonderful and active time with your lil man. Cant wait to see the pics. I am really glad for this site. I wasnt going to join it but i got curious one night. Smile

  • Big Smile Congrats on the little one on the way !! I am 17 weeks pregnant, and I can definately understand your emotions getting the best of ya. I am a happily married woman of  9 years and even I feel alone sometimes in the amazing/joyful/wild/scary Pregnancy Journey. Sometimes I want to share little things and my hubby just doesn't get it. I think it's because men and women are on different wavelengths. Just make sure, no matter what to take care of YOU. By taking care of you, it takes care of Baby. Make sure to take the Prenatal Vitamins everyday. Eat a balanced diet as much as possible...I say this because some days eating well will be easier than others. Drink plenty of water....all of this helps Baby grow, and helps you stay healthy. Know, that even when you feel so alone that you can't bare it....you are NOT alone! Many women are on the same journey as you...growing an amazing Baby that will change our lives forever.Star

  • MomsRulez-

    It's been a few days since your last post so I wanted to check in with you and se how you are doing.  How are you feeling? Are you still feeling scared?  Do you have any questions?  Let us know how we can best support you!

    -Jess

  • Hey Jess!

    Im feeling good. I have my high and low moments. Morning sickness has gotten better. Not feeling scared anymore. Just dealing with back pain. But, i go to the doctor on Friday thats when we find out the sex of the baby as well. So we are pretty excited about that. No questions so far...Cant wait for the weight gain though...I dont feel pregnant...Makes me sad sometimes...But other than that things are great :-) I will post what happens after my doctors appointment. Thanks for checking on me i appreciate it :-)

  • I understand how you feel completely. Yes it does get better but not overnight. Find mommy support groups in your area or try and stay around family and friends.