Depression anyone??

  • Hello Everyone,

    I am 32 weeks along and this is my first baby but I live with my fiance and his 3 kids.  Here is my dilemma,  I am starting to get really depressed and angry all the time. I feel like I'm going crazy sometimes. My poor fiance has been dealing with it very well but it is starting to get to him also. I am going to speak with my Doctor about it when I see her again but I really want to try and stay away from meds. 

    Does anyone have any suggestions for a full time mom, fiance, pregnant woman on how to deal with this, without meds? Also, do you have any suggestions for my fiance on how to deal with ME while I am going through these psychotic episodes? I have looked everywhere for advice for him and I can not find any. He is an amazing man and I am really scared that this is going to really bring our relationship down. It is already going that way.  And lastly, has anyone else felt angry and depressed while pregnant? I read about anxiety and depression but not anger and depression. I feel very alone right now feeling this way. I would just like to know that I am not the only one.

     

  • My wife and me are expecting our third child in December and she has been very sick for about 12 weeks now. Our two kids are still in diapers and sometimes we're not on the same page. All you can do is take it minute by minute and try not to get too stressed out.

    My wife and I have agreed to not take out our frustrations on each other if possible (and sometimes it isn't). I would just make sure that when the stress is at a low moment and you have a chance to talk, make sure you apologize and try to express what the issue is that got you started in the first place. Always remember that your children is a stress that other would give anything to have!

    Your doc will probably put you in touch with a support group that can definitely help... good luck and I hopes this helps you and your hubby.

  • I know how you feel. I'm not sure if the weather around your area is better than in mine but my doctor suggested going on walks. My problem is that it rains here almost every single day. I dont want to get sick and i want to take my 9 month old on a walk with me so i'm limited to nice weather walks. But any kind of exercise you can get will help with your mood.

  • Thank you so much for your reply.  I know that it makes my hubby feel better knowing that he's not the only one who's going through this. You are absolutely correct, communication is the key to this. We are nornally a pretty great team and this has really thrown us both for a loop.

     

     

     

  • My problems are different, but the best way I found to deal with them is writing in a journal.  You can say exactly what is on your mind.  Sometimes it helps to settle my thoughts down, then I can go back and look at them and see if I am feeling better or worse.  I wouldn't hurt to see if you can try and take some of the frustration and anger out on the book instead of those you love.

     

    good Luck

  • I live in Oregon. I know exactly what mean about the crappy weather. We have had more rain this month than any other month this year. I have decided to just suck it up and get bundled up and walk in the rain anyways. I found that  just the sound and smell of the rain while I'm walking is extremely soothing. It's a nice decompression time after a long day at work and a good start to a nice evening with our children and my hubby, 

  • Your fiance probably feels totally helpless (my husband was CLUELESS for a long time).  Think about concrete things he can do to help support you, such as:

    - give you a foot rub

    - take the kids to the playground and give you a few hours to yourself

    - order take out and clean up the kitchen afterwards

    - LISTEN without trying to solve things

    - get out for a walk with you

    - do the grocery shopping or other chores you dislike

    A lot of men just don't know how to handle depressed women, and he probably worries about you more than he's letting on.  Giving his concrete ways to help you will help him feel less helpless.

    Also, try to find other pregnant mommas -- meetup.com can be a great tool -- look for mom groups.  Also, try going to the children's area of your library and see if you see any other preggos there---strike up a conversation!

  • Thank you everyone for all your advice. It really helps.  My hubby and I have had a great talk and came out on the light side of this tunnel.  My depression seems to be calming down a lot but who know's how I'll feel tomorrow.... Big Smile   Thankfully I have a great partner.   It's really awsome hearing from dad's. I really enjoy the real life experiences and advice.