difficulty sleeping.

  • hi i have a four month old and she is sleeping alot more than she used to im not going to lie, and she has finally gained the sucking strentgh to keep her paci on yay! but shes having a little difficulty actually getting to sleeep. My daughter probably takes like 2-3 cat naps (15-20 mins) a day. which is obviously nothing. I try to get her down by maybe eight-ish. I do that by trying some winding down activities such as putting her pajamas on, reading a book and a bottle of milk. after that i rock her for a few mins and put her in the crib drowsy so that she can soothe herself.....uh yeah right. she starts screaming her head off so i wait a little and walk in and put her paci back on and tell her that mommy is here. she will calm down but as soon as i walk away she screams again. this goes on for about an hour untill i cant take it anymore and i end up rocking her to sleep. i mean the crying/screaming is unbearable. she will scream to the point of actually coughing and gasping for air. i even got her an electronical mobile for christmas and still doesnt work. i lay her in every position possible and it doesnt work. i have got her a wedge to elevate her head and it doesnt work either. i checked with her dr to see if she might be teething and shes not . its not her diaper, shes not hot or cold i mean what else is there to do? P.s she hates being swaddled , gets too distracted with music or the vacuum or whatever help me i dont think its normal for a 4.5 month old to not soothe herself to sleep. oh by the way this goes on the whole day too. she refuses to be put anywhere. uh help please??? Tongue Tied

  • Every child is different, and learning to self soothe can be very difficult. With my daughter (when she was crib sleeping) we would actually have to get her to sleep first and then put her in the crib after she was out. Usually she would stay asleep the entire night, and the nights she woke up in the crib she of course scream. Rather than take her out one of us would go in and pat her back until she calmed down, then soothe her until she fell asleep again. After a couple of weeks she was doing much better about going back to sleep on her own. We did also buy a crib device that attached inside the crib - it lit up and played music when she touched it and that seemed to help a lot too - instead of screaming for us she would touch it when she woke up and the sound and light would help her back to sleep by herself.

  • I sooooo feel your frustration. My first baby (now 4 years old) did the same thing... hated being put down. The only solution I found I hate to say was to basically hold her as much as I could.  I got one of those carriers that you wear and she went everywhere with me.  It as a pain in the back for a while, but it was the only way to pacify her for about the first six months of her life.  I don't know why.  My second baby, now 4 months, is starting to do the same thing. But I got a Moby Wrap this time and I use it all the time.  She is not as demanding as my first was, but I think that may have something to do with the first one being formula fed only.  It seems things have been a little easier with my second who has been breastfed. Not sure, just a hunch.  It will get better, I know it's exhausting.  Hang in there and get a good hot bath now and then to relax your back. 

  • Strong Dad is right; every baby is different and every parent is, as well. The Ferber Method (crying it out) doesn't work for everyone. My feeling is that at 4 1/2 months, your baby may not be up to self soothing yet. I didn't even think of trying to start the cry-it-out method until my girls were at least 6 months, more like closer to 8. Until them, I rocked them until they were asleep and then put them down. To me, them sleeping was more important than self soothing. Plus, it gave me some extra cuddle time with them. Today, my 9-year-old goes to sleep all by herself (as she should) and so does my 2-year-old, though I have to stay in the room with her. Again, this gives me some alone time, which I a definite plus.

  • i know is really hard, my son use to be the same way he will not sleep for nothing, but after a few times of let him cry it out, he finally go it.
    when in the crib if he will start crying my wife or me will take turns and sit next to the crib and just pat his back or just to sing to him till he fall to sleep.
    i dont know if this is your case but when taking a nap make sure there is no noise around, i mean loud.
    get dad involved, he can help like we use to do it, good luck.

  • I hope you've found some relief.  I know this can be exhausting and frustrating. My rule of thumb is to talk it over with your pediatrician. I agree that this age is really too small to expect them to figure out how to calm themselves or "self soothe." I think I held my first daughter 22 hours of each day... well, that's what it felt like.  But it does get better and there is light at the end of the tunnel.  Having gotten a clean bill of health from your pediatrician, perhaps your best bet is to surrender to lots of rocking and holding until she exits this phase. Book reading and mobiles and position changes probably won't help much at this point, if at all. All babies are different and their personalities are different. Some just want that warm body holding them and aren't ready for being left alone in a crib until they are a little older.  Hang in there and snuggle her up while she's young enough to do so. 

  • HI Laura:) Dont worry there is nothing wrong....My daughter is 10 mths old and until about 2 mths ago Sienna would do the same thing:) I called her my energizer baby...haha SHe would take the little cat naps and hated to be swaddled.  I could rock her to sleep and as soon as I laid her down the screaming began. It didnt even matter if I was still in the room. Ahhh....I couldnt handle it either cuz she would lose her breath and start coughing.  I'm not sure if it was the right thing to  do but my husband works 6 days a week and I'm in a new area so I needed the sleep too but I let her sleep with me (not that I suggest that you do that) until she started crawling then it was time to make her sleep in bed.  She's still in my room (is your daughter) but she will sleep by herself now.  I was trying to put her down around 8 but it wasnt working so may I suggest letting her stay up a little longer (but not late) and try not letting her catnap after 6 pm.  I found that kept my daughter up even later.  Also if she seems to sleep better knowing your there, you could try putting a pack and play in your room for her to sleep in.  Eventually I will move my daughter to her room but for right now if it isnt broken Im not going to fix it.  hahaha 

    Hang in there.  I thought I was the only one with an energizer baby cuz my nephew is only 5 mths and he's been sleeping through the night since he was 3 mths old (even in his own room) I wanted to strangle my sister n law...j/k hahaha It will work out though:) Take care.

  • Here are a few things I do with my 3mo boy

    good luck