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I'm a first time mom and both my fiance and I work night shift. Our little one stays at my mom's now that my fiance has started 3rd shift as of a month ago. While he was at home he kept her and had her on a great routine, I put her down before work at 10:30pm, she'd wake up around 3 am take a paci and fall right back to sleep with no other interaction and was back up at 5:30 for a bottle then right back to sleep until 9am. She's not a big sleeper to begin with she only takes 30 min naps during the day but that was ok if she was sleeping through the night. When I have her on the weekends now I noticed she was up all night. I hate to say it but I think my mom has spoiled her and now she wakes ever 2-3 hrs wanting to be held, she's so tired but patting her doesn't work and she falls asleep as soon as I pick her up but when I try to lay her back down she refuses, this goes on for hours because I wont bring her to my bed. Now she sleeps about 40min - 2 hrs every 3hrs during the day and is up and down all night, what do I do? This can't be healthy for any of us, no one is sleeping.
My guess would be that part of it is that the shift in schedule is fairly recent, and it could be that your daughter is just having a hard time adjusting to the new routine and needs more time.
If you think your mom is part of the reason she's not sleeping as well why not sit down and talk to her about the schedule you had? Maybe she just doesn't understand what you were doing or why. Tell her exactly what sort of routine you'd like for her (she is your daughter after all, and you have a right to set the standard on how she is raised). Also, does she cry when you put her down and were you using the "cry it out" method? Maybe your mom has a hard time listening to her cry and that's why she picks her up so much. I had a majorly hard time listening to my daughter cry the first few times (my poor husband probably thought I was loosing it--I cried about as much as my daughter did!). If that's the case tell her to find a distraction that's interruptable at intervals. For me it worked to play solitaire on my computer or take a quick shower. I could still hear my daughter just in case, but I was also distracted enough to not sit there and dwell on the fact that she was crying.
I hope some of this helps. Good luck! Not sleeping is tough :)
I agree--talk to your mom about what she is or isn't doing at night. It may not be your mom's fault at all, but babies often mess up their schedules frequently. If your mom is holding her or spoiling her at night then work on a schedule together that you can both live with. If your mom knows what you want her to do and what to do when the baby cries, then you can maintain consistency...which unfortunately is everything!!!
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