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What about the perfect father driveby I get from my husband? He thinks I worry too much, I hold him too much, Raiden is spoiled and it's my fault. I shouldn't do this and I shouldn't do that. I'm sorry to harp on his mom but she didn't even raise her first five kids(my husband included) How would he know how to be a good mom? Its our first child. I just want to develop my parenting style as the nuturer I'm supposed to be to my son. When it's his turn to watch raiden(which he hardly ever wants to when except when we're in public) he can be whatever kind of parent he wants as long as there is no danger
First, I LOVE your son's name! It's really cool :)
Second, OUCH! I tend to follow your thinking, as well, that you're doing what's instinctual, which is difficult for fathers to understand. It sounds like you have some negative energy coming at you and I don't blame you for wanting to talk about it. Have you tried doing the same with your husband?
My ex used to be like that and it was a major issue for us. While we ended up getting divorced, I wonder if talking about these issues and differences or even sharing them with a counselor might have made a difference for us.
When we tak it's one sided. Me. He puts no input and says nothing helpful. When he does talk he says that he works all day and when he gets home he wants to relax and watch tv not feed and diaper and bathe. I do most of it and I try to do my classes online and sometimes I just need help. He can make comments about what I'm doing wrong so how does he know if he doesn't do anything.
I totally know what you are saying. I get it all the time, I have been active duty Army for 11 years and I get I could never leave my children to go to Iraq. It is so frustrating because nobody asked them to join. My daughter is happy and healthy at seven and my son will be too. My husband and I defend our country of our own fee will and yet we are given a hard time for leaving our children when other don't want to.
i have a 2 month old baby girl who i wake up periodically throughout the day-just when i think she has slept enough, so that she can sleep at night-and this works. my grandmother kept saying things like 'i never woke my babies up' and 'why are waking her up?' and when i told her it went right back to 'i never woke my babies up' finally i got up the nerve to say 'i'm the one who has to get up with her at night' and amazingly she stopped, now she just looks at me a little funny. that 2 seconds of bravery was worth it.
jessicaguereschi - hehehe, I love that. It feels good when other people start respecting you're the parent. I can't count the number of times I've wished to do the same to someone but held my tongue. Thanks for giving me the courage to try next time someone does say something!