Moms & Dads

Flexibility vs. Routine

AnswerDad03 — Fri, 17 May 2013 13:00:41 GMT

Every family is different and parents have to decide what works best for them. Some of our friends are slaves to their routine. They will leave any and every function to make sure baby gets naps at regular time. My wife and I have professional and social obligations that prevent us from establishing a rigid routine, but we feel that young children adapt. What’s your opinion? -- Chris, StrongMoms Facilitator

Moms in Dubuque

clarkf — Wed, 15 May 2013 16:23:32 GMT

Looking for mom friends in the dubuque area.

Exercise

Brinny — Thu, 16 May 2013 18:42:37 GMT

We all know that we need to exercise to stay fit and healthy, but how do you manage to get your daily exercise in with your busy schedule? What is your routine?

I take my daughter to the park after breakfast to run and climb off her energy at the playground, then when she is tired enough for a nap i put her in her stroller and make a few laps around the walking trail. This morning i enjoyed a 2.4 mile walk with my daughter and admired all the blooming trees and bushes, birds, squirrels, ducks and geese... What a wonderful way to start off the day.

I'm a dad not a mom!

ryansDad13 — Sun, 03 Mar 2013 05:12:10 GMT

Hi everyone,

My wife and I just had a baby girl on 2/25. We both due our research but I was the first one to get to Similac's site so I'm now a StrongMom. Ryan is our first baby so I hope my questions don't seem silly.

Different parenting methods

PediNurseJulie1 — Mon, 06 May 2013 15:36:46 GMT

My husband and I have somewhat different parenting methods. I tend to do more explaining and talking out of behaviors while my husband sets more boundaries and asks my son to make good choices or he will receive a punishment. There is some merit in both but it drives my husband crazy when I correct him in front of our son if I feel he is being harsh. I know I shouldn’t correct him but I feel bad for my boy...am I wrong? - Julie, StrongMoms Facilitator

Super Mom/Wife

clarkf — Mon, 06 May 2013 13:12:35 GMT

I have a 5 month old beautiful baby girl, and I'm about 6 weeks pregnant. The past 3 weeks I have become the perfect wife. Even though I work 3rd shift(only 3 days but still!) The house is clean every day and I cook for him, and I am the one that takes care of our daughter.

Well the last 4 days I've been exhausted, and sleeping most of the time. The house got a little messy, and I have not been cooking dinner. I make him breakfast every day though.

Another note, we're not married, we're not engaged, I'm just being a super amazing gf. I love him, I want him to be happy, but sometimes it feels like I do all the work and it's not fair.

Well last night his xbox headset broke and he got upset. I was sleeping and I just woke up to pee, and I hear him mumbling around the house, "all she does is fucking sleep, she did this shit in Milwauakee."

I go out and confront him, "If you have an issue tell it to my face. Don't mumble around the house talking shit."

He says, "Don't come at me like that." etc etc etc.

Well, I couldn't fall back asleep, bc I was upset. So I decided to clean up the house, if I'm going to be up and I always clean when I'm upset. So I'm doing the dishes and he comes up to me and says he's sorry. I'm still upset so I'm like w/e its fine. He stands there a bit and I just ignore him, so he goes back to playing his games. He "helps" out a bit when I clean and vaccum the living room, I then go to bed. He comes in and asks if I'm ok, I was still upset, but I told him it was getting better, which it was.

My issue is, I feel like I do everything, and he expects it, so I don't get any thanks you or the house looks nice. When I bring it up he's like I clean up after myself...(-_-)...and I help with Brielle. He does not I feed her I change her, I'm the one who plays with her. he'll hold her for about 20 mins 3x a day.

This might be more of a rant, but anyone else going through this? Should I try and talk to him about how I feel, in a different way? and how?

Especially not that I'm pregnant and tired all the time, I would just like a little help. He feels like since he works 5 days a week and I don't he shouldn't have to do anything when he comes home.

Husband wants a divorce b/c I got an IUD

PeytonsKloset — Thu, 25 Apr 2013 20:41:56 GMT

My husband & I just celebrated our 3 year anniversary. We have 4 children total. He had 2 boys (from an ex girlfriend) who we have full custody of. They were 15 months and 2 1/2 years old at the time when we met. They are 6 & 8 now, so I am "Mom" to them and they are my boys. Together we have 2 daughters. One who is 2 years and a 2 month old. My husband doesn't want any more and has pretty much convinced me that I don't want any more either, so he wanted me to get my tubes tied. I didn't want to (I'm only 25 & he's 28) I told him I would to make him happy. I asked him several times to have a vasectomy, but he is terrified of hospitals and needles and refused point blank. Well up until the night before I delivered my 2nd daughter I changed my mind about having my tubes tied and told him I rather have an IUD. He didn't want me to have one, since his ex girlfriend had one years ago and got infected and eventually had ovarian cists. (not sure if the IUD caused it or not) he just heard so much bad stuff about them. Any time we brought the topic up, it ended up in a fight. So I just never brought it up. I went ahead and had my dr order the Mirana and it finally came in. I mad an apointment this past Wednesday to go in and have it placed. I didn't keep it a secret, my husband knew I had a dr apointment but I guess didn't realize it was for the IUD. He texted me later that day asking how my dr apointment went and what I went in for. When I told him to have the IUD placed, he FLIPPED OUT! Told me he was filiing for divorce (which he's mentioned a time or two over the past 3 years and never did anything) but the fact that he is so beyond pissed b/c I had an IUD put in. He doesn't like to wear condoms, b/c he says he feels like a kid back in high school. I know he is dead set on no more kids (& I sorta am too) but I also read a study that about 75% of woman who have their tubes tied under the age of 30 regret it later in life. My take is, being so young what happens if we do end up wanting another child later on? Or god forbid something tragic happens to one of our kids? I know you can't replace a child, or if we get a divorce later on and being that the boys aren't biologically mine, I decide I want a 3rd kid?? The list goes on, on why I don't want my tubes tied and he just doesn't understand! So it's been Day 2 and I haven't talked to him. (though he was out of town for work) but he comes home today. Am I wrong for having an IUD? Does he have a right to be mad? I know it's my body and I can do as I please, but since we are married should he also have say so in what I do? Any help or advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks!!!

Vacation

AnswerDad03 — Fri, 19 Apr 2013 12:20:33 GMT

My father is turning 75 this year and to celebrate, my parents have invited our entire extended family on a cruise. We are very excited about going, but my mother is insisting our three kids, including a 1-year old come along. My wife and I are just not comfortable taking our youngest on a cruise at that age, and we have someone who will watch her. Are we being stubborn?--Chris, Strongmoms facilitator

Pregnant 3 months after I just had a baby!

chrishaundamitchell — Tue, 24 Jul 2012 20:36:12 GMT

Me and my husband had a baby in April of this year. We immediately decided that we would not have anymore because of the challenge we had during the labor of our recent son. We used the app called "My Days" on our Iphones to monitor my ovulation and when it would be safe to have sex. 3 months after my son was born we found out I was pregnant again. We had changed our minds about not having anymore children but we did not think that it would happen this quickly especially being so careful. How do you cope with having 2 babies in diapers and keeping the stress down to a minimum?

Thank you everyone for the responses. Four months into our pregnancy we lost our unborn son we named him Caleb Israel. After 2 surgeries and months of healing God has filled the void and press on forward. Thank you again for all the comments.

new baby, new mom, new life

lovemybabygirl01 — Thu, 18 Apr 2013 01:53:36 GMT

hi all! Im new to the site and motherhood. i just had my precious baby girl 2 weeks ago tomorrow. i was 38 weeks exactly when i had her. My doc induced early due to complications i had earlier in the pregnancy that weekend the placenta and made it so she wasnt getting all the nutrition she needed to grow. she was 4 lbs 3oz and spent 4 days in the nicu due to her size to ensure she was eating and gaining wheight properly. she didn't tollerate labor at all and her heart rate was only in the low 80's during a contraction and it wouldnt come back up like they wanted it to so they ended up going ahead with a c-section and she was delivered at 1:35pm thursday april 4th. thankfully she is happy and healthy and just the perfect baby. a first time mother couldnt ask for a better baby. she hardly ever cries unless shes hungery or just wants to be held. me and my husband couldnt be happier. We had just gotten married 3 weeks b4 finding out we were expecting so kind of a suprise but a great one at that. love her so much and all the pai. of labor (even as hard of labor as i had) and the c-section would never make her not worth it!

Problems with the Father of my baby.

Gilleygirl13 — Sun, 14 Apr 2013 03:12:55 GMT

I am currently 24 years old and I have a beautiful baby girl who is 2 months old. I have been stressing out a lot lately because the father of my baby doesn't seem to want anything to do with her. He is 26 and goes to college full time. All during my pregnancy he never told anyone about me or the baby. I only met one of his friends and that was before I was pregnant, his family doesn't even know. I hoped that during my pregnancy he would get it together and come around, he never did. When I went to go to the hospital for my C-section didn't want to be there. He only came to the hospital for about 5 minutes and that was to sign the birth certificate paperwork. He didn't even hold her while he was there, he barely looked at her. Well now that she is two months old I am thinking that he will never come around. I talk to him daily on the phone. He gives me $200 a month right now and when we meet up I have to get a baby sitter because he doesn't want to see her. It is really starting to bother me more and more each day that he doesn't seem to care. I want to be able to get over it but I feel that if his friends and family knew then he might change. I want to tell people but I am scared of how he will react. I don't know how to deal with this. I do everything I possibly can to make sure that she has everything that she needs and he doesn't even want to see her. I send him photos of her in the mail and he never makes any comments about them. I will ask if him want he thinks of her and his only reply is that she's a baby. It truly breaks my heart and I don't know what to do anymore. Please, someone give me advise on how to handle this.

Getting your body back after baby

PediNurseJulie1 — Mon, 08 Apr 2013 12:32:09 GMT

If you are anything like me, getting your baby weight off isn’t easy! Now that I have two little kids, getting out the door to work out is even harder. Does anyone have any tips and tricks for getting the extra pounds to go away? -- Julie, StrongMoms Facilitator

Wake-up Routine

AnswerDad03 — Fri, 08 Mar 2013 15:07:21 GMT

Our morning routine was crazy with three kids, and now promises to be even crazier with our newborn! Between getting ourselves ready, waking sleepy kids, making breakfast, packing lunches, selecting outfits, packing school supplies, etc., my wife and I are stressed like crazy before we go to work. Any tips on how to better manage our mornings?

—Chris, StrongMoms Facilitator

My husband lost his job---what do I do?

MommyRN4 — Fri, 29 Mar 2013 22:00:21 GMT

My husband lost his job when our 5th baby was just 3 weeks old. I hate seeing him so unhappy and confused now about the direction his career is heading and I know he is worried about providing for us all. How can I be supportive of him and encourage him during this difficult time? -- Bonnie, StrongMoms Facilitator

Getting through storms and other natural disasters with a family

MommyRN4 — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 15:13:37 GMT

This year there were many different storms and hurricanes that caused a lot of destruction across the United States. When you have a family, even a power outage can be a difficult time. How do you keep a family occupied and safe during storm power outages? ~Bonnie, StrongMoms Facilitator

Family Tension

AnswerDad03 — Mon, 11 Mar 2013 01:36:40 GMT

My wife’s aunt has been a godsend to our family. She comes over everyday to look after our kids and does it for no charge. She spends a fortune on gas, helps out with food shopping and dotes on our girls as if they were her own. Despite her very close relationship with my wife, my aunt does things that either intentionally or unintentionally drive my wife bonkers. I often try to make my wife look at all the positives involved with her aunt’s constant presence, but lately my wife is hitting the boiling point. Help! --Chris, Strongmoms facilitator

Tooth Fairy

AnswerDad03 — Sun, 03 Mar 2013 23:41:05 GMT

Recently, my oldest daughter lost her first tooth! I did not consult anyone before determining I would give her $2 under her pillow (plus $1 to her little sister just because!). One of my friends informed me that I may have short-changed her! I was paid $.25 for my first tooth in the mid 70’s, so I thought I was in the right ballpark. What do you give your kids from the “Tooth Fairy?” --Chris, Strongmoms facilitator

Mom friends?

clarkf — Sat, 09 Mar 2013 20:19:57 GMT

Wondering if any Moms in the Dubuque, Iowa area would like to become friends. I use to live here a couple years ago, but since then friends have gone. Looking for someone to chat with and do thing in general with.

or Mom groups in the Dubuque area!

New mom

NoreenH — Sat, 02 Mar 2013 22:20:34 GMT

Hello all! Just wanted to introduce myself. Just had my little one 6 days ago. Any other new moms feeling terrified?

Planning for the Future—How do you do it?

MommyRN4 — Thu, 31 Jan 2013 19:32:26 GMT

With 5 children, it is easy to get caught up in the "now" and forget to plan for the future. Do you plan for the future—such as college funds and braces? How do you do it? Any tips and tricks to help other moms out there? --Bonnie, StrongMoms Facilitator

Vacation

AnswerDad03 — Tue, 30 Oct 2012 14:21:44 GMT

We are beginning to plan a vacation for our family of five, including three kids under five years old. As always, money is certainly a factor, but we want to do something that is both fun for the kids and also for mom and dad. What was your favorite vacation experience with your family that didn’t require a king’s ransom? -- Chris, Strongmoms Facilitator

first time dad

daddybear_vbs — Tue, 12 Feb 2013 07:33:18 GMT

Hi, I just signed up. I'm a new dad. My newborn baby boy Vincent was just born February 6 early in the morning. I'm taking a few weeks off work to be home with the baby. I don't have a lot to say right now except, Hi! and that I'm already in love with this little guy. The first moments with him were the most intense feelings I've ever had.

Post Pregnancy Constipation

Cath1234 — Fri, 08 Feb 2013 21:22:56 GMT

I am a new mom. My baby girl is now 2 weeks old. She is a dream and we are super lucky.

The issue is really with me. I have not been able to go to the bathroom normally. I got home and my OB said to try Senekot which helped me go but only once. Then 3 days later I was at a loss so I tried an at home enema which worked but now into the second week and I am still not back to normal.

Has anyone else had this problem? I just took another enema because after 7 days its way too uncomfortable but I don't want to be taking these all the time and fall into any bad habits.

Any advice for a new NJ mom who simply wants her own bathroom routine to be back to normal??

Social Media Photos

AnswerDad03 — Mon, 25 Feb 2013 01:34:03 GMT

My favorite part of social media is exchanging photos of my kids with friends and family and in return receiving photos of their kids. Recently, I have been made aware of just how easy it is to see pictures of children on social media sites, and for someone to target an address where kids live. Should I stop posting and remove all photos of my kids from the internet, or am I being paranoid? --Chris, Strongmoms facilitator

Thank you to family member

AnswerDad03 — Wed, 27 Feb 2013 13:42:06 GMT

I’ve often written on the boards about my wife’s aunt, who retired from her job to basically look after our kids. She saves us a fortune in daycare and provides the kind of peace of mind you get from knowing your babies are with a trusted loved one. Despite this help, we are on a very tight budget. I am trying to think of a thoughtful gift to present her as a token of our appreciation, but I am stumped. Does anyone have any suggestions? --Chris, Strongmoms facilitator