See what moms are talking about today
View or share your favorite baby photos
From pregnancy to motherhood, every mom has questions or could use some support. Join the conversation to learn from or help other moms just like you.
Join now to get nutritional guidance and up to $329* in benefits
What are the benefits of membership?
`He isn't being a man and stepping up- be the great mom you are and contact him- be sure to make it clear that an in and out dad is not ok- that he needs to be there for his son one way or another and not just when it is convenient for him. A child is no laughing matter and he seems to think so otherwise he would have acted sooner. Good luck and I will pray for you.
I would probably never know and understand what you're going through because I'm not in your situation. If I am, I would not waste my time looking for my baby's Dad. If he wants to be a part of your son's life, he would have made an effort long time ago. So let him be! I can not understand how other men can be so heartless. My husband adores our daughter! He calls her "MY BOO". Be strong and strive hard to be the best mommy you can be to your son.
I am in the same boat. My son is now 7 weeks old and his father and I are in the same profession (we're both equine trainers). He has told me many times that he wanted to be involved and now he hasn't called or came to even see his son. I have heard from the grape vine that he has been spreading lies about me, saying that I am not allowing him to see his son. I addressed the problem on a public website (not accusing him of anything) because I am going to defend myself. He call me up saying that I had to drop what I said. I told him "no" if there is something wrong being spread around about me I am going to correct it and tell what is really going on.I have now heard that he plans on moving to Texas currently He lives in North Georgia and I live just under Atlanta. I have now filed for Child Support.
All I can tell you is that my life started out very similar to your story. No father involved with my son, despite the usual promises. I learned to have pride in myself and provide the best possible environment for my son and our future. I worked 2 jobs while pregnant and started back to school. In the end the hard work pays off! My son is happy and healthy and recently adopted by my husband. There is an amazing life past the worries of an uninvolved father. Just remember that you are responsible for that new life and yourself and the pieces will fall into place. You cannot change another...just yourself. Hold your head up high and hang in there!
I know how you feel. I just had my baby not a week ago, but her dad is not doing what he should. He also said that he would be here for the both of us, NOT! If I were you, I would attempt to contact him a couple of times only. Don't give him the chance to say that he didn't know. If he doesn't respond, you'll know that you did your part. If you don't feel comfortable doing this, then just wait it out. The ultimate decision must be yours and yours alone. Just know that the most important people in all of this it you and your baby. Good Luck!
I would contact him just to let him know you had the baby and how you are both doing. I would leave it to the details. Then if the dad wants to respond and be a part of your lives he has the oppertunity. It puts the ball in his court. I still am dealing with a situation where sometimes my son's father is involved and sometimes not. The only advice I can give you on that is to do your best as a mother. You can't control how the dad does or does not respond so try not to stress it. Your son will undesrtand once he gets old enough. Just focus on your sweet angel and let the rest fall into place!! Good luck with everything!
I have a three year old daughter. I left her father when she was 3 months old (leaving just meant that I walked out the door, prior to this he never even acted as if she were born). He had a lot of issues that I discovered after I left. I was truely devastated when I left wondering if I would be enough for her, if I could be her mother and her father. She talks about him but it as if he is just a friend of her and nothing else. I do feel sad for her at times but I know that I did not want my child to grow up wondering why he did not want to spend time with her or if this was the way relationships should be. She is very loved and we are truely bonded. For you with a very young child it will be challenging, trust me I know, but it is always better to surround your child(ren) with loving and supportative people . The gold pot to the end of the story is that I recently married a man that loves my child like she was his own and she does call him daddy. To anwser you question, I don't beleive that I would call because you already know the anwser. Best of luck to you and your son.
I would have to suggest that your daughter needs a good dose of reality- it was no longer about her or her boyfriend from the second she got pregnant. I think she needs to talk to and see strong women making it without the help of a man. And speak to those who rely and depend on everyone else to provide for their children. And those who don't have the benefits of having help.She has options- which choice is she going to make for her son?
I understand where you daughter is coming from, this is probably the last way she ever thought her life was going to turn out- a single teenage mother with a deadbeat father. I know I didn't have single motherhood written on my life plan!
Continue to support you daughter, because without you, she has nothing.
I speak from experience- I am a single mother to a one year old boy, I work full-time 50+ hours a week, full-time student, and I have no help. No family to support me, my son's father & his family turned their backs on us, and I don't receive any economic or daycare assistance from any county/state agency. I do it all by myself. Yes, its hard, I'm exhausted, frustrated, sad, and even sometimes a little angry. But I couldn't be prouder and happier everyday when I look around my home and look at my son. Without me, my son has nothing and noone. With me, and me alone he has the best of everything and anything. He's happy, smart, healthy, funny, so handsome and special.
I honestly wish I could share my entire story directly with you and your daughter so she can see that it can be done. Her son's life & her life can be exceptional- & she can do it by herself!!!!
But I will tell you, my #1 motivator is President Barack Obama. His story is my son's. He managed to attain the position of the most powerful man in the world. President of the most powerful country in the world and he fought hard all the way without giving up.
I am praying for you and your daughter- your grandson deserves to know that he too can be President of the USA- or the president of the PTA....but he doesn't have to be angry, lazy, unproductive and unsuccessful.
You and your daughter have become to your grandson the shell that protects the pearl.
If you sent a birth announcement or let him know in some way that the baby was born i would leave it at that. I would contact your local legal aid and find out if you need to do anything (state laws differ) to make sure that you have custody in your name. (if the father wasn't listed on the birth certificate you may not need to do this but check just incase), at least if you do it "legally" he wil have to invest money and time to get visitation which implies that he is committed to having a relationship. I wouldn't just let him walk in and out of your sons life make sure that he knows hes either in or out. that will be less painfull for your son in the long run
I have a 3 year old daughter. I went through my whole pregnancy without her father and the starting of her life till about when she turned 7 months then he decided that he wanted something to do with his daughter. Honey men will be men and to tell you the truth there are other men out there that will treat you and you son a lot better than what he is doing to you now. I feel your best bet is to move on and find a better man that will be there for you and your son. You deserve better....I'm sorry to hear that things did not work out. Cheer up! There will be better days to come.
Hi, Im 19 weeks pregnant with my first baby. My childs dad does not want anything to do with us either. I just found out he is dating someone else. Its really hard, but I realized hes not the most importnant person to me, my baby is!! I told him It was ok, and to do whatever he liked. His family is not involved, so im kinda hoping they stay away from us, once hes born. Its your choice, but I think you should not try to contact him. I think they made their choice once they decided to move on, n forget how important that little person is. You might want to put child support on him, if you need the help. Thats the least he can give to your son. I wish you the best, and remember your not the only or last person this happens to. So dont be so down!!! You have a gift that will always bring you joy.